Pixar films, ranked

Last week I reviewed Hoppers, which I consider to be among Pixar's finest works (or at least holds its own with the company's previous heavy hitters), and promised to rank every Pixar film this week.

This is that week.

Here is that list.

I'll be arranging the films into tiers more or less, and elaborating on bunches as necessary. Note that this list only includes official Pixar films, and stuff like Planes and its sequel, which co-exists in a Pixar universe but is not actually a Pixar film, is not ranked herein.

Actually Bad

30: Cars 2

The Pixar movie so bad that they ignored 100 percent of it in the sequel. If you think about any portion of the Cars universe for any amount of time, your brain will melt, and I'll probably have to write about it all at some point, but Cars 2 just makes every single thing that happens a strain on your sanity. I can tolerate Cars 2 because my son is fully Cars-pilled, but it's objectively the worst thing the company has ever done, and they'll say so.

Bad by Pixar Standards

29: The Good Dinosaur
28: A Bug's Life

I actually think that The Good Dinosaur is among Pixar's most incredible-looking films (particularly the landscapes and scenery), but it has an extremely long tradition of "Pixar's bad movie" so who am I to argue with that? (I have many more far worse opinions about Pixar movies later on in this list.) It's many miles better than Cars 2, but it's extremely forgettable otherwise (the design of the human child aside). A Bug's Life is elevated in most people's minds and lists due to it being Pixar's second film, and definitely deserves the legacy it's carved out. But contemporary viewings of it are very unenjoyable (not even getting into the Kevin Spacey of it all), and it's fairly meandering and lifeless aside from the circus bits.

Totally Solid

27: Elio
26: Up
25: Elemental
24: Cars 3
23: Brave
22: Incredibles 2
21: Inside Out 2
20: Finding Dory

You may notice that the above tier has a lot of sequels in it. The sequels are generally good! Oh, yeah, and I ranked Up very low and I understand that a lot of people (including me!) have extremely powerful memories associated with the opening 5-10 minutes of that movie. The rest of the movie is not very good! A lot of very cute characters and winning performances, but not a very rewatchable movie at all. If we're talking best sections of a Pixar movie, Up is maybe the best there is. But there's like 90 other minutes in that movie and it's all downhill from there.

Pixar Has Made a Lot of Good Movies

19: Soul
18: Onward
17: Cars
16: Lightyear
15: Coco
14: Monsters, Inc.
13: Monsters University

Every movie in this section of the list is roughly on par, and I do enjoy Monsters University to Monsters, Inc., although a lot of that has to do with how rough those very early Pixar movies look in hindsight. It's not fair to hold "massive technological advances" against this groundbreaking company, but a big part of the reason Shrek isn't on Pixar's level in the general public consciousness is because it isn't nearly as good at storycraft and it looks horrible. At least Pixar (usually) always makes sure to make the movies fantastic stories first and foremost.

The Pantheon Begins

12: Ratatouille
11: Turning Red
10: Finding Nemo
9: The Incredibles
8: WALL-E

Hitting unimpeachable territory here, and most are going to find very little to argue with from here on out. Very little.

Mostly Toy Story Honestly

7: Toy Story
6: Hoppers
5: Inside Out
4: Toy Story 2
3: Toy Story 4
2: Toy Story 3
1: Luca

Toy Story is the North star for Pixar, of course, and Toy Story 5 is just about to drop. The first Toy Story suffers from all of the genuinely creepy vibes of early Pixar (especially the human characters, of course), but it's also jarring how much all of the toys dislike and distrust one another in that first installment. Woody is petty and jealous and full of himself, and the other toys are perfectly willing to mutiny against him or trash talk him at any opportunity. Toy Story 2 course corrects and really gives the crew the personalities that would become so iconic, and I know I'm in the extreme minority preferring the two sequels to 2, but I promise it's simply a matter of degrees where spots 2-4 are concerned on my list.

And Luca is simply the best. That's all I have to say about it.

Coming soon: a spirited defense of Lightyear!